I've been signed to David Stafford's Record Label!!!

[DKeys]

This arrived from Ectosplamic Records and I was thrilled to see that all those hours practicing the electric fife has paid off. (David, when do i get my royalty check?) Larry Poonish was always such a joy to work with and luckily his tuba tones were so low you couldn't even hear them. I have not listened to the CD inside as I am waiting to play it at my housewarming party. David Stafford is not only enchanting, but genius, and definately must be a very famous person posing as a humble IOUMA mail artist. Thank you David---this made my day!!!!!!  Can't wait to see what is actually on this CD, but admit I'm a little scared at the same time. will it make my eardrums bleed?

[David Stafford]

what he said....

[De Villo Sloan]

From Paul De Man's seminal lecture at Yale University: "Crypto-Fascism and the Post-Structuralist Impulse" 

"Now we come to the work of Diane Keys & The Elgin Marbles, almost impossible ti find. The achievement of these performances is the realization of the trope: (A) This is music. (B) This is not music. (C) This is is not music. The performances are a hermeneutic circle, always encased between two floating signifyers. The attainment is not a natural deconstruction; it is, rather, a process of designification, resulting in what was believed impossible: The achievement of death in the simulacra. We might expect shock or boredom. We find neither. To enter into the performance is a state of death that is not death. The decreasing designification makes us increasingly aware of the gravity of absence. What we take away from a performance of Diane Keys & The Elgin Marbles is that we are profoundly grateful it is over."

[David Stafford]

Okay....well....re: Mr. Stubbs...supposedly he has all the DK bootlegs in a safe deposit box in Nashville...rumor only...Klaus Voorman was never a Marble but he did sit in on the Burl Ives/DK supersessions. (Also Claudia Lennear was the voice of Squalkie on the spoken word interlude in DK's Royal Fifedom cut). Hat tip to Keith. Not many know he has a heart of gold and a kidney made from various lamb parts. He was also instrumental in getting DK's religious album into WalMart. Okay, the deal he cut forced them to retitle it "How Great WalMart" but it went platinum in two days and no one was killed though several were hospitalized. Re: Phil: man, that cat had a new wig every day of the session including, I kid you not, a mullet made of real Motown Mohair. Total Class Act. That puke story has been around the block a few times. It's mostly true. Phil, wherever you are I hope they're treating you right and you're taking your vitamins. I heard you're pumping iron and that's a good thing.

[De Villo Sloan]

PHIL SPECTOR SAYS ALBUM WAS 'BUNCH OF HALF-MELTED CASSETTES AND EIGHT TRACKS' - BIGGER MESS THAN 'LET IT BE' - STAFFORD GENIUS FOR CREATING WALL OF DRONE

"When David Stafford called me in to work on the Elgin Marbles album, it was an offer I couldn't refuse. He used to be the US President, right? Aka Dave Dees, right? And the Elgin Marvels? I knew them back in Cleveland. And, kids, I WAS drone music. Andy, Lou, Billy Name, Lamonte... I worked with them all. Now a producer like David Stafford, you don't presume to tell King David something. You suggest. And I said David - down in the New Mexico studio - this is a bigger mess than 'Let It Be' ever was. I mean, this Elgin Marvels stuff was a bunch of half-melted eight tracks and cassettes. And Dave goes, "Right man. We are not going for the Wall of Sound on this. We are going for the Wall of Drone.' That's the kind of genius this guy is. We're editing this live track of 'Take Three.' I go: 'Geez, Dave, you can hear someone puking in the background, like an animal. I'll scrub it off the track.' And Dave goes: 'No Phil, leave it and ramp it up.' That's the kind of genius he is. And now we have this masterpiece. 

- Phil Spector

[De Villo Sloan]

RICHARDS SAYS 'ELGIN MARVELS CHANGED THE WAY WE THOUGHT ABOUT MUSIC' - MICK SAYS 'FORUNE TELLER CHICK IS HOT' - RONSON WAS THE REAL PIG, SAYS KEITH, THANKS BIG DAVE

"I'm thrilled Big Dave is releasing these tracks. On US tour, we heard the Elgin Marvels - they were called Elgin Marvels back then not Marbles. Mick said, 'The pig stands out and the fortune teller chick is hot.' But like, man, the Elgin Marvels changed the whole way we thought about music. Now the pig, man, the real pig in that act was Mick Ronson, but you know, I'm sorry about the Toronto thing. The Elgin Marvels are a gift to music everywhere."

- Keith Richards

[Katerina Nikoltsou (MomKat)]

Galerius PALACE...(the Parthenon is a TEMPLE).

"A nation in turmoil"...are they going to Syria, too?

[DKeys]

DVS-I see Stubbs is now in a national commercial for Geico. I think he can now afford to pay me back. Snouts, thugs, and chocolate bowl?

[DKeys]

the clerk didn't crack a smile

[DKeys]

The Elgin Knob & Knocker is hilarious. I'm sure it is superior to what we have--the courier and the herald. we were looking for knobs at the Home Depot once and I asked where the knobs and knockers would be--didn't crack a smile.

David, PLEASE tell me there are no more copies of this CD. I think it needs to come with a warning not to listen to while operating heavy machinery, eating, drinking, driving, sleeping, or hosting a party. I now feel tired, depressed and agitated at the same time from listening to it. The songs (funeral dirges) sounded so much better at the time. I think I'll hang up the electric fife. They should have used auto-tune on it but I guess they didn't have that tech back in the day. I like the weather report "pretty damn fair"

[David Stafford]

Actually the best would be the Elgin Knob and Knocker