"I'm not Lost I'm somewhat off the way" --Dogs Die in Hot Cars

Greetings,

I have not been a member for very long and I have been sporadic about my postings, mail art and general forms of communications.  I apologize because I feel very blessed to be part of something so amazing as this website and for all of the wonderful pieces that I have received bringing a lot of light into my mail box.   Nadine you are AMAZING and extremely dedicated art penpal and I am in love with your pieces too :).

For two years I have battled and nearly won chronic depression/anxiety (it has been longer than that but I would say two years ago my mind decided that the heat was on.)  My parents moved in with us and have been helping me recover; which has been a blessing and well a very cramped affair since my husband is really the hermit by nature.  And so I have been juggling mental health, lack of space and a huge wall of artist block.  To put a cherry on top of it all it appears that I may have sleep apnea which makes my days a big "yawn" and "confusion" so in the end this has lead to poor mail art on my part and being an active member of IUOMA. 

I know this is a a lot to just whip out and I don't expect anything especially if many of you have written me off of your address book, but I am heading back to a path of WANTING to do art again.  I can't say it will be great or "aww"some but I would like to continue to be party of this group. 

I have lost track of who I owe artwork to (except for Nadine) and so if you would like me to send you a piece (without the requirement of sending me a piece first) please let me know!

Thank You and Blessings

Nikoya

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Comment by PIRO on February 23, 2012 at 2:54pm

Hi Nikoya (love your name). Welcome back. Door here is always open so fill at home again. There are so many lovable and of course talented people on here that i am sure it's a good place to be and feel good about yourself and develop some talent.  There is no rush, just start again and blessing in the journey. You are not alone. My best wishes.

Comment by Nancy Bell Scott on February 23, 2012 at 2:25pm

The bravery of others here, including you, Nikoya, makes me speak up. There has been much clinical depression and panic disorder in my family, and I wasn't the *one* who got away. A particularly bad bout ten years ago made me believe art would never happen again--but it did. Taking it slowly as you are doing will lead you back. It started with making loose watercolor abstracts on little postcard-size d'arches paper, no pressure. But there was no one to send them to at the time! They broke the ice, though, that was the important thing. You'll find your way to break through it too. 

Comment by vizma bruns on February 23, 2012 at 8:29am

My arm is the problem too. Surgery, steroids, you name it. So far I can handle mail art, short and small projects, at least that's some kind of artistic outlet! Otherwise I'd be a bigger nutcase!

Good support all round, and best wishes to you too Austin!

Vizma.

Comment by Austin Wills James on February 23, 2012 at 8:18am

I completely agree Vizma, my drawing/painting arm was paralyzed for 6 months & is just now mending. Even though it still hurts like hell sometimes. So, Nikoya, I'd be happy to exchange art with you; without any expectations or pressure.

I love the sense of support & encouragement that I've found since joining IUOMA, at the risk of sounding redundant...we're here for you.

Sincerely,

-Austin-

Comment by vizma bruns on February 23, 2012 at 8:02am

Wanting to be involved in art again is a really, really important step, Nikoya! I have been through this too when I first suffered from chronic pain after an injury. It's horrendous when you don't even want to get out of bed in the morning...or evening! It is SO important to have people who can support you, and it looks like you have a few volunteers to help you here, including me.

 Let's start mailing!

All the Best,

 Vizma.

Comment by Carina on February 23, 2012 at 7:38am

A heavy situation but good sign that you still have longing to create. I have experience of the disease from my family. Respectfully and with best wishes, Carina

Comment by Austin Wills James on February 23, 2012 at 5:15am

Nikoya,

   I also suffer from a lifelong battle with anxiety, panic attacks, & depression. I often go through bouts of "What was I thinking?" when I look at my art after it's been sent. Even though folks like us suffer from different obstacles, hurdles, & challenges; I just wanted to assure you that you're not alone.

-Austin-

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